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[17 Nov 2005|08:18pm] |
We made it this far
Weve made it through everything..
i cannot wait to see where we will end up.,,
I love you Erik Timothy Schurig
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1 were meant to be
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| update |
[14 Nov 2005|07:03pm] |
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mood |
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 down |
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music |
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system of a down cd.. I love it |
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So I havent been on here in a while, so i figured id update and let whoever still reads this know whats going on..
well, Christine had her baby! :) 4 am this morning. My step dad ried is in a really really bad mood today though. it could have nothing to do with that, but who knows with him anymore.
Mom and I grow more and more distant. It feels like by the second, we get farther, and beyond repair. We fight so much about the move. It tears me down really. Everything ive worked for and built up here.. soon to be useless. I dont understand her one bit anymore.
I just feel on edge, I have so many things on my mind like..
The move.. obvious though. Who would want to move their senior year??
Uncle Terry.. Hes not doing the best, its scary knowing someones locked behind bars with people who jump him, treat him like shit, and I worry for him everyday. Not to mention his physical health isnt where it should be at all. its gotten 100x's worse since hes been in there.. go figure huh.
Dad.. Him and his girlfriend of 6+ years are fighting a lot, and hes questioning things concerning her.. and not to mention drinking when hes down again.. he was sober for 8 years, why cant he stay like that huh? I refuse to talk to him or be around him while hes drunk. I went through a period of that in my life, and to say the worst night of my life ever occoured becasue of that in itself, so.. no.. i will NOT be a part of that EVER with him again..
Grandpa Paul.. who has cancer, and is dying, not to mention my mom wont let me go see him for thanksgiving and wants me to stay home bymyself. THEN.. mike says "you cant stay here.. my girlfriend and I will be here for the weekend, you need to go somewhere".. so im not wanted anywhere with family, but mikayla and kory opened their homes to me for the weekned..thank you two ♥
My mom and I's relationship is diterating, as I mentioned before so...
well im going to order pool cues at mikaylas, goodnight all
comment if you ♥ me
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5 were meant to be
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| please pray |
[02 Nov 2005|07:44pm] |
im hysterical.
im moving away from everything (except erik) that i truely care about..
and now ive found out...
my grandfather is dying, hes getting his affairs together already and hes mad at me because i didnt visit him this summer, ive tried to email him and ive gotten no response, im too afraid to call because everytime i talk to nana she chews me out about the summer. Not even a year after grandpa bennett dies, my grandfather, my mothers dad is dying.
please pray
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2 were meant to be
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| wow what a long time its been.. |
[01 Nov 2005|09:59pm] |
So I guess i'll start with the most recent..
as most of you know, im moving to tennessee this summer. My mom told me tonight shes not considering letting me move in with mikayla anymore. I taked to mr gordon today, and he said i could graduate early. All I have to do is take 3, possibly 2 classes online. English IV, economics, and american government. So. I dont know.. My first instinct is no, but id be graduating with friends down here, instead of tennessee. Then Id graduate, and go to college and get bright futures because moneys an issue for me.
Thats most recent, im going to TN with them this thanksgiving too to look @ property. Wow, its becoming real. they are really moving.
one of my best friends is drifting from me. it bums me out, but ive tried, ive been trying and honestly im tired of trying over an over again ... and getting nothing but you snapping at me, freaking out, and treating me like im nothing to you anymore.
homecoming was allright. the only good part was dressing up, seeing everyone pretty, and the party afterwords.
i have so much on my mind about this. PLEASE COMMENT.. I NEED EVERYONES OPINIONS!
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6 were meant to be
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[24 Oct 2005|09:40pm] |
NEW LAYOUT!
EVERYONE LOOK AT IT!
I MADE IT MYSELF<33333
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3 were meant to be
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[08 Oct 2005|08:46pm] |
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mood |
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 giggly |
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music |
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talking to kory mike gina and mikayla |
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VOTE FOR ME FOR JUNIOR COURT PLEASE!
<33333333
and for the record...
MATT CLARK IS THE MOST EMO GUY EVER ON THIS PLANET..
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5 were meant to be
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[16 Sep 2005|10:56pm] |
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mood |
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 crushed |
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music |
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avenged sevenfold |
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so i didnt think that my mom was serious..
but she was
this summer theres a really good chance im moving to tenessee around knoxville i guess
i dont want to leave my senior years, i love you all.. :(
im really sad
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3 were meant to be
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[06 Sep 2005|06:37am] |
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mood |
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 pissed off |
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music |
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all american rejects |
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waking up to the wonderful sounds of my mom yelling at me.. lovely
The day where i graduate and move out couldnt possibly come soon enough..
i miss you erik, these are the days where all i want to do is be with you
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2 were meant to be
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| Bad day |
[30 Aug 2005|08:23pm] |
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mood |
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aggravated/fed up with ur shit |
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music |
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mudvayne |
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Ok, so here.. first off to whoever is reading my journal and then going "ohmygod.. guess what megan was doing this and this, and hanging out with so and so" just quit being retarted. all you are doing is starting drama. all i did was HANGOUT with someone. can i not hangout with my friends? let alone the people who are like brothers to me, and nothing more. If all you have to do is feed off of the drama, and start shit then.. well.. you are pathetic. Im not directing this twords any particular person, but im just saying.
That is one reason, why my journal is going to be a friendsonly journal from today probably.
( now, for whats going on with me )
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5 were meant to be
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[29 Aug 2005|10:04pm] |
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aggravated |
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mudvayne! |
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So, tonight was fun.
Gina, Mike, Kory, Rachael and I hung out. Nothing special.. just hanging out, ya know..
We went to the beach, came back, watched football.. again. nothing specail. had fun though.. gina is awesome!! <3333333333333 lol
well.. not a lot else to write really..
i got the first letter from my uncle saturday.. i dont think ive cried so much in a while, since he got sentenced. im so worried about him.. hes not doing well medicaly, and i mean hes already 46
Not sure if i want to spend the money on a concert ive earned. i might get a photoalbum, and make it pretty, and get pictures of me when i was a kid and send it to my dad for his birthday..
well not much else to write.. <3 much love
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2 were meant to be
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[27 Aug 2005|01:45pm] |
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excited |
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music |
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mudvayne- choices |
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Mudvayne concert
Septemeber 3rd..
Next weekend!
Im going!! woot woot!!!!!!!!!
I AM SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO EXCITED
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2 were meant to be
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[25 Aug 2005|09:13pm] |
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Made by my wonderfull boyfriend, Erik! :)
BEST FRIENDS ARE LOVE!! <3
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4 were meant to be
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| lost |
[23 Aug 2005|09:13pm] |
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mood |
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 crappy |
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music |
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kelly clarkson- hear me |
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I just dont know how to deal with my stress anymore. Anytime I try to resolve something, anytime i try to let my feelings out, anytime i try to releve the stress... it makes it worse.. All I know how to do anymore is bottle it up..
a number of people today and yesterday have said ive been acting not myself lately... anyone else think that???
please comment
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7 were meant to be
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[18 Aug 2005|08:49pm] |
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i found this puzzle thing from brandis myspace
http://six.flash-gear.com/npuz/puz.php?c=v&id=77289&k=26370877
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3 were meant to be
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[11 Aug 2005|04:14pm] |
ok so i want to make this clear.. over the summer i updated some times this summer and did lists of like shoutouts and stuff.. if your name wasnt in there its because i dont know if you read my lj or not. usually i just do shoutouts to people who are on my friends list, and to people who i know read it.. so dont take it personal, and dont think i forgot about you...
iloveyouall.<3
**edit***
So, this year Ive noticed something. People have changed.. well i know, duhh everyone changes.. but some people have changed to the point where they arent the people i became friends with in the first place.. not saying i dont like them. im just saying, they are far from theirselves. Its awkward, like they act like they are better than "certain people" including me. I dont know, it just kind of well.. stupid. REally stupid =/ I just feel like ive lost friends, but it happens. you know?
Im calling my dad today and seeing if i can come up for thanksgiving. i doubt mom will let it happen, but its worth a try. i really want to come up, and erik said hes gonna take off the time to come over and my dad already said he likes erik a lot, so he will let him come over whenever if im there. even if im not. i was like wow thats awesome. ok, well for now im done venting i guess. <3 much love
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8 were meant to be
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[09 Aug 2005|07:33pm] |
so everyone who i envy right now are the people at the swim team meeting who CAN swim..
my mri appointment is next wednesday at 4 15
my follow up with the doctor is the next wednesday at 4 15
:( you have no idea how much i want to swim.. and people like my mother have been telling me that if i have to get surgery done, im done for swimming for good.. that makes me want to cry. im better at swimming than jrtoc. its like my life. i got best newcomer feshman year, and then got injured last year. :( im very very sad
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7 were meant to be
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[08 Aug 2005|07:21pm] |
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So im tired of being pushed to a certain future. My mom and step dad are constantly talking about seatlle, and oregon and how great its going to be. It kind of makes me feel bad, like it makes me think "wow so great away from all of your family, and your daughter" but i shouldnt think like that. Theyve been saying that they wont pay for my college, and they are moving right after i graduate and unless i go to the army or airforce/navy then i wont be going to college. :( i wont let that happen, and neither will my real father. I dont want to enlist after highschool. I dont. I want to go to college. THen again, my mind might change. who knows. as far as im concerned.. college here i come once i graduate. I just want to make up MY OWN MIND ABOUT MY FUTURE.. they tell people im going in the air force, and TELL people what "i am doing" once i graduate. i never thought it would be like this.
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were meant to be
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| school |
[08 Aug 2005|02:39pm] |
SO heres my schedule
1st- American History, Mr. Falls
2nd- Chemistry, Mr. Allen
3rd- JROTC Staff, Col. Lane
4th- SGA, Mrs. Slay
5th- Algebra II, Coach Eberley
6th- Court Procedures, Coach Thomas
7th- AP literature, Mrs. Cox
im pretty content with it, i guess...
im glad i got 2 classes with gina!
2 classes with rachael!
1 class with mandi!
:)
much love...
im going to take a long nap! lol
<3 i miss you, and love you eirk
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2 were meant to be
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| tonight |
[04 Aug 2005|10:02pm] |
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So, i did stuff with sga all day today for freshman open house..
and..
I saw Jaclyn and Nikki!!!!!!! :) <3
I was so excited! I cant wait to see everyone again at school..
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4 were meant to be
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[03 Aug 2005|10:08pm] |
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So heres a breif update..
Been doing SGA stuff at school, and will be doing that tomorrow too.. freshman orientation is tomorrow and SGA does that.. so.. ill be there all day,
Ill be there the first half the day friday too with ashley for jrotc, and s-4 stuff.. gotta love it, i know theres going to be a lot of stress.. so.. im just really glad that ashley is working with me, because her and i get along really well.
Saturday might go to disney with matt, or go school shopping.
Eriks working a lot, and I miss him more and more everyday. all i can do is think about him every second. I cant beleive its over already (summer that is) I feel like i never left here, and i dont like it. im just back into my regular routine already minus school. but.. anyways, ashley and i talked about it.. and we are NOT going to deal with the drama this year with jrtoc. its like middle school shit like ashley said.
anyways, i know i planned to hang out with alota people before school was in but i didnt realize how busy id be. so, I PROMISE YOU ALL.. once things settle down after school.. then i will make plans with everyone.
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4 were meant to be
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[31 Jul 2005|09:22pm] |
wow, its been a while.
I talked to my daddy today! :) <3
Im going to spend the night at mandis tonight!! :)
I miss erik a lot </3
I love him so much though.. this year is going to be so hard away from him.
Not a lot else to say, call me if you want.. 2841674
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1 were meant to be
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[28 Jul 2005|11:15am] |
So, im home. the flight sucked and i miss erik more than i ever imagined. i cried soo much yesterday. (i know lame) but i did..
so, the parents arent letting me go ANYWHERE untill after the grandparents leave.. im super pissed.. so for everyone who i had plans with.. im REALLY REALLY sorry and super mad but, they wont let me do anything so.. :( I have a doctors appt. at 8 am tomorrow, and still no internet in my room. so.. well.. im gonna go.. I will write more later..
<3
IMISSYOUERIK
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2 were meant to be
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| She dosent understand |
[24 Jul 2005|06:39pm] |
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So.. I got a call today on my cell phone from a 713 area code. I was like What is going on? Whos this? I didnt anwser it in time, so I listened to my voicemail.. and it was my daddy! :)
We talked, I asked where he was first. He said right next to the chicago border. My uncle john called the cops on him, so he left. It was well, an emotional phone call. He explained what happened, and I was in amazement, how your own brother can turn on you like that. Let alone, what grandma ganske did. Anyways, he has a great job interview tomorrow and is looking at a house. He's moving on, starting a life. He wants my address, and wants to write me, call me, send me stuff. So, I will send him stuff, and letters all the time. He started to cry, he kept saying "im sorry megan, im sorry.. i didnt want you to see me get arrested" . I understand everything. but as soon as I heard him cry.. i started to cry. He kept saying I truely do love you megan, you are my little girl forever. I just... already miss him. Ive been missing him since he left. The cops were out there sunday sure enough. I hate my uncle john with a living passion now. we talked about mom for a minute, and he said tell her to give me a month, and however much you need.. let me know.. He told me he wants me to come and visit him this summer, and he'll even pay for me AND erik to come up. He told me I could live with him if i wanted. That they have everything our schools do down here, not like rogers city.
When I talked to mom, she didnt beleive it. she said that shes done trying with child support.. I wanted to scream everything that I knew. but, it wasnt the time. I was so tempted. All she could do was run him down. sometimes i hate her, and sometimes i dont understand why the hell she does what she does.Why did she want to keep me from my dad. I love my dad dearly, he is an awesome person.. really he is.
I could get up and leave in two seconds to my dads no problem.. but I wont do that to my mother. He can put her in federal prison for years, but he dosent.. and everyone thinks hes the bad guy? ive never got that at all..
Ever since ive seen my dad, my life has been so much more complete. I dont wonder anymore. I know that my father loves me and cares for me.
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6 were meant to be
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[23 Jul 2005|11:26pm] |
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941*284*1674
I come home wednesday night.. so friday night and on, i will most likeley have free. Unless my parents make me do "family stuff" because theres family coming down with me to visit.. so.. call me if anyone wants to hang out..
Thursday reserved for Jacy! <3
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4 were meant to be
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| Family |
[23 Jul 2005|11:14pm] |
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mood |
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 sunburnt |
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Today I went to a waterpark with erik, nikki, and frankers. it was fun, it was like nothing compared to adventure island but it was pretty nice for northern michigan. lol. anyways, i had a good time with everyone.. Erik is very burnt. Im not burnt bad, but im from florida so im more used to it than everyone else here..
Tonight I went out to my grandmother's house and visited with my uncle bruce :).. He's my Godfather too.. But, anyways.. he lives downstate untill the 15th of august so i dont see him much when im up here.. He's awesome though. We talked for a couple hours.. I really do love my dad's side of the family. Some of them arent the best @ times, but I really do love them all. My two favorite uncles have ALWAYS been uncle bruce, and uncle terry. <33 I really wish I lived closer to my family, but it wasnt here. I mean, I just love the fact that in this town I have tons of places and tons of family to go to if something goes wrong. In florida I only have my house, christinas house, grandma bennett, and grandma pearls for family.. =/ Im going to miss my family.. I already miss uncle terry =/ </3
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were meant to be
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